Alright, subscriptions have officially gone too far…
It seems like everything is subscription-based these days. Streaming services, cell phone plans, apps, video games, software, music; it never ends.
Now, if you want the camera in your toilet to work, you’re gonna need a subscription for that too.
…
…I know what I just said.
This isn’t like a “Chuck Berry” kind of bathroom camera; this is a new product from bathroom fixture giant Kohler called the Dekoda.
It’s a little camera that uses an optical sensor to have a look-see at your leavings to make sure everything is working alright.
I’m not sure, but somehow it can discern if you’ve got some sort of catastrophic issue or if you just had beets for lunch.
Science.
As goofy as it is, this technology could save lives, which means that the price tag of $599 isn’t too bad for some peace of mind, especially since that’s all you’ll ever pay, not a cent more.
…wait, I forgot: according to PC World, you’ll have to pay $7 a month or $70 a year for your commode cam to function.
This is just absurd.
A subscription for your toilet camera?! Yup. (Getty Images)
Can you imagine, there’s someone out there who has to say to their wife, “Did we remember to pay the s–t camera bill this month?”
So, no flying cars yet, but we have to say that?
The future is now.
The thing is, once they get you paying for a few months, you’re hooked. You get used to doing your thing and have some camera go, “Yup, everything looks good. Nice work!” It would be hard to get away from that.
You’d be afraid that if you don’t pay $7 to have your feces analyzed like it’s game tape, that’s when things will go sideways and you’ll have no clue.
This might be the psychology behind subscriptions.
That, or I may be as full of s–t as the Dekoda’s memory.
Read the full article here
