We have MADE it … again! Another week, another Friday the Libs allowed us patriots to get to. Dummies! Now, we’re staring a FAT college football Saturday platter straight in the face, followed by the NFL on Sunday.
Mix in a little postseason baseball and preseason NBA (just kidding, of course), and I think we’re in for a big few days. It’s October. The weather has turned. Pumpkin patches are thriving. I’d wager to say there’s an Oktoberfest festival in your town at some point this weekend. It’s GO time, folks. Let’s go.
Welcome to a Friday Nightcaps – the one where Anna Paulina Luna continues to pump out #content even during the government shutdown.
What else? I’ve got the best of the rest from a big week, JordOn Hudson and Bill Belichick on a hot mic, Aaron Rodgers getting FLATTENED by his own teammate, and NHL reporter Anna Dua battling through a tough fall and stays focused on the mission.
Shockingly, she’s also a star. Weird. These sideline reporters never are! You’ll see.
Grab you whatever you want because it’s an Autumn Friday, and settle in for an end-of-the-week ‘Cap!
Joe Flacco & Aaron Rodgers made me some money last night
How can you not love football after last night? What a scene. What a game. I even thought Al Michaels was on his best behavior, which we haven’t been able to say a ton this year.
What an absolute pleasure it was to watch Joe Flacco and Aaron Rodgers sling the rock around in 2025. I even cashed a +2000 parlay, which is unheard of in this house. I’ve been on a gambling cold streak for two years now. But that’s why you never give up, folks. The American dream.
Anyway, Aaron in particular was on one all night long. I knew we were in for a special finish the SECOND I saw him rip a smelling salt after breaking the huddle.
Electric:
Incredible. They just don’t make ‘em like that anymore. Jaxson Dart is probably the closest thing. Between cashing a big ticket AND being a Ja’Marr Chase & Tee Higgins fantasy owner, it was probably the most enjoyable TNF game I’ve experienced in quite some time.
The #content wrote itself:
What a week of #content!
Amazing. Hey, did y’all know that the right side of Pittsburgh’s O-Line weighs 1,000 pounds? God, do you think Al and Herbie shoved that down our throats enough last night?
We get it, fellas. We know. We gotcha. They’re massive humans. Move on.
Anyway, good work all around from a couple old-timers. Can’t wait for the rematch next month. Until then, let’s get to the #content, starting with sports talk radio in Cleveland this AM:
Lesbian Keith, NHL Anna & JordOn runs the show!
What a WEEK! This is how you keep October rolling. Good work to everyone. Couple thoughts …
1. Good to see Anna Paulina still pumping out #content even though the useless government has been closed for two weeks now. Serious question … what happens if we just never reopen it? Seems like something we should look into.
2. Tiff Ann gets docked some pretty major points here for posting Christmas thirst in October. Disgusting behavior. I understand she has to stay ahead of the trends, but come on. I know insufferable Mariah Carey is somewhere defrosting right now, and it makes me sick. Let’s respect Halloween, Tiff Ann.
3. Good to see Kay and Velvet work well together. Didn’t see it coming!
4. The ONLY reason I invited Keith to class is because he’s gonna lead off our final rapid-fire segment of the week.
Don’t worry, though! Nancy Mace is joining him!
Nobody attacks Nancy Mace and gets away with it. Not on my watch, at least. And certainly not a deranged, Trump-hating lesbian who looks like he smells like moth balls.
And that’s what Keith has devolved into, in case you hadn’t noticed. LOOK at that creature above. Just disgusting.
This ain’t your daddy and granddaddy’s Keith from ESPN. This is 2025 Olbermann, and it’s chilling.
Which makes his attack on Nancy Mace over her recent hairstyle even more insane. You can’t attack people’s looks when you look like a freakshow yourself. You just can’t. It’s why fat people never call other fat people fat. They don’t have a leg to stand on.
Keith doesn’t have a leg to stand on in this arena, but he went for it anyway. And, predictably, it backfired.
What a scumbag.
Next? From an old lesbian to a young, hot, THRIVING heterosexual:
YES! Get ‘em, JordOn! Look, everyone is freaking out about this video today. They all think JordOn’s insane. Hookstead called it an embarrassing moment. Hogwash. Let’s all grow up.
You can’t tell me JordOn’s the first gal to infiltrate an old dude’s world and completely take it over. It’s Hot Girl 101. She’s 24. He’s 73. He has all the money in the world. She wants it. This is a tale as old as time. When you’re single, 73 and rich, and some cheerleader comes knocking on your door, I DARE you not to answer.
Now, should JordOn – for as smart as she claims she is in this video – have known that they’re on set, and they’re wearing mics, and those mics are probably on? Sure. Most people in that world would’ve known that.
But, that’s how the youngins learn, I reckon. You have to let them learn to fly, am I right?
PS: Who the hell is Tony? I’m not sure who wants to bang him more, Bill or JordOn?
PPS: The website Jordon is boasting about? It’s one of the worst things I’ve ever seen. Maybe keep that one to yourself next time. Check it out HERE.
Finally … let’s end the day – and week – with Sportsnet’s Anna Dua. Welcome to class, Anna! Chin up!
See you next week.
OutKick Nightcaps is a daily column set to run Monday through Friday at 4 p.m. (roughly, we’re not robots).
Can you blame Bill? Email me at Zach.Dean@OutKick.com.
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